Mind Candy

This is a true story...well not all of it...okay not much of it anyway. Alright none of it is, except the simple fact that I don't have TV.

Kim speaks and says "We will no longer pay for TV. We do not need a TV in each room and besides we will save ourselves some money in the process. We are spending 70 dollars a month and to me that is just ridiculous, and for what? The basics channels and maybe a couple of our local channels? That's 840 dollars a year just to watch TV."  This was Kim's idea of a great way to cut costs. I wasn't sure what to say or how to respond to this ridiculous thought process. That would be like taking away the crack pipe from the addict. You seriously want to get rid of TV?  After all, I am pretty sure that I got my monies worth out of it. I could watch multiple shows at once by just a few clicks with the remote and ..it seemed I didn't miss a beat and I still knew what was going on after each click. In fact I think I even got Great comfort in just clicking through the channels. Why is it for a man, theres something very satisfying when we are handling the remote and are able to turn through channels with a click of our finger...oh yeah...CONTROL !!  That's what it is!! But what will I do without it when the TV goes? Think fast ...I will tell Kim I am putting my foot down and will not allow it. Better yet...I will tell her that I will meet her half way and that I will  settle with just the basics of the basics of channels...the $19.99 a month value deal.

From out in the kitchen I hear..."I called them and service will stop at the end of this month" Huh? Did I just hear you right? She comes walking over to me and said "You don't care do you?...We talked about this last month too remember?" Of course I remember...(like I am to old to remember stuff such as a simple conversation we had a month ago) Geesh Kim....I don't care...I don't need TV to keep me entertained" I said with a uncertain authority in my voice. OMG..did I really just agree to that? Quick...Plan B....Oh that's right...I don't have a Plan B. Dang it. OK just breath...it wont be that bad. And besides...she wont be able to handle it either...Once she sees how boring it is without TV..she will be right back on the horn asking for a technician to come out and hook it back up again.. Just wait it out.

Note the date and time....Oct,28 2009 its 6:48pm

Today's date: Jan.27.2011 8:56pm
Boy how Time flies...Who knew she likes to read?  The Superbowl is coming in a couple of weeks and its times like these when I wanna just scream  I mean.. are you kidding me right now, What am I going to do????. Ok just Breath...again.  Lets think this through. What am I really missing? 
Aside from cool stuff like the Superbowl?...mmmm ....Everything !!!  What about American Idol? The new Dance shows? The cool reality shows, like Survivor,The Pickers, Pawn Shop..and all the other really  cool shows that I don't even know about because I haven't had TV? ...so yeah...I'm not missing to much. And Its been this long and I have survived without it, I mean...who needs to stay current with the news...its all bad stuff anyway right? Who needs the history channel....I never liked History anyway. Who needs  to watch all those Food network cooking shows......We never have all the groceries in the house  to make that stuff anyway. And who needs ESPN to see my favorite teams highlights from the day before? Wait a minute....I kinda need that one...well I want it anyway,  But I guess I have survived on just reading about them and  watching video highlights on the Internet for the past year...whats another year without TV?
Hey I just thought of my angle I am going to use on my wife to get TV back.. Ok here is how it will go.

"Honey...I think I know why I had a heart attack (yeah hit her with the bomb right off the get go) its because of the stress I have had to deal with from not having TV. Its not funny Kim...quit laughing. I have anxiety from knowing that the Lions are playing  games on Sundays and I have not been able to watch them lose any of them". And when that doesn't work...I will just say "Honey,Look Damn it , I want my MTV"  (I know.....I'm singing that song now too)

I  know...I'm SO screwed.....I don't have a valid reason (other than I'm bored) to have TV back in the household. And to be honest, I just find other stuff to keep me occupied...so whether its a book , the Internet, or cleaning (whoa...scratch that last one) I find things to occupy my time. Kim thinks we are doing this Great thing by not having TV because of all the wasted time that I sit in front of it. But in all reality...it doesn't matter...I will find things to waste my time with. Do I learn more when I read a book than if I watched a TV show or two? I think not. In fact I would bet that a person can learn more from watching TV for a year than they could from one year in college. I mean, I went to college and I cant remember anything that I learned....aside from drinking a bunch of whiskey and eating Taco Bell makes your next day very unpleasant. Yes...Most things we learn from experience.(wink)  So what have I learned from this experience? I have learned that Everyday Life just doesn't offer up enough mind candy to satisfy me.....unless I have TV.  :)

P.S.

(with HBO and ESPN)    : )