Like Father.... Like Son

You look just like your Father....I hear it all the time. And its true....I do. I have his hair, smile, and natural good looks (Yes...I just said that) We even have the same sense of humor. However....There is this one thing  that I hope I didn't inherit from him. The ability to say"I'm proud of you" to my kids.And this is why I wrote this....please keep in mind that I Love my Dad very much....he dedicated his life to raising six kids after my mother left when I was twelve. So I don't want this to sound that I don't Love and appreciate who he is and what he has done for me. Nuff said!!!!

My Dad

 I had heard that my Dad didn't really care for my Blog. My immediate reaction was that I don't write it my blog because I want his approval. However, my next reaction was....what didn't he like about it? Huh?...I didn't want his approval but I want to know his thoughts on it? Hmmm..maybe I did want it. But it made me think if I ever really had my Dads approval on anything I have done in my life. I cant really think of I time when I ever had heard him say how Proud he was of me. Isn't that our goal in life....to make our parents proud? It kinda is...I think...and to grow up your whole life trying to prove something to people that you seek it from...can put you on the dysfunctional side of living.
(I have mastered that part of life.)
 But it starts with the things that you say....you will look at them for their approval. Then it slowly moves into to actions....and the next thing you know you are living your whole life hoping you get someones approval....only to find out that its not there.
I don't want to make my dad out to be some sort of non caring father who never gave a shit about his kids and never supported them....that's not what I am saying at all. My father was a very supportive man and would always give a word of advice or encouragement to any of us kids when he thought we needed it. He went to my wrestling matches and football games...I might have even seen him at a track meet once or twice. I wonder if I had went pro in football or made it big with singing if I would have heard those six words from him then?  My point to all this is....Why do I search out his approval all the time? He is not the kind of guy who would bluntly come out and say it anyway...he would say something like...that was really nice, or Good Job son ....something else but never..."I am so proud of you son".
I remember when I would sing at events like weddings or a baptism for a niece or nephew....My dad would say something about the song like..."Yeah...I could really understand every word you sang"....wow dad...Thanks I was hoping for a "That was Great Son"...or "I am so proud of you...you were Fantastic". instead I really just felt like saying....wow Dad...did you get a new hearing aid? (No he don't wear one...but at the time.,..I wished he did.)

My biggest Fear is that I might treat my own daughter the same way.I just hope that my daughter never feels like that. I hope that she always knows that I am proud of her....she doesn't have to become anything , or do anything spectacular....except be herself. Always wanting approval is such a bad thing. You can miss out on some important things in your Life....like satisfaction and Pride You should live your life with a drive to be your best...that's right...YOUR best. And if you do that...you shouldn't need any ones approval except your own. Maybe that's it...I don't need my Dads approval as much as I just wanted it. I know he Loves me and that is enough for me.