My Rock

Today I wanted to write about My Rock. And like all rocks they are always the same, you can move them anywhere you want, however they are still a rock. They dont change, and they can give you that stronghold you may need when you are slipping. No, I am not going to post about the rock I found when I was a kid and still have...I am posting about the life rock I have.... my wife Kim. I have always wanted to post about her because of the importance she has had on my life.

I met Kim in High school when I was a sophomore. She was a cheerleader and was making posters for the basketball game coming on that Friday with her sister.  Kim has a identical twin sister named Kelly (very identical) Well, myself and my Best friend Paul and the rest of the wrestling team were running in the halls as we normally did, when we ran by these hot looking chicks. I had seen them from a distance before but they didn't really interest me...you know being freshmen and all. :) But once we started flirting with them...that changed...a lot!!!

I immediately fell in Love with both their smiles and personalities.It was love at first site! But wait.... it couldn't be that much of a story book romance right? Well it wasn't...Kim started going out with Paul, and I started going out with Kelly a while later. And after awhile when Kelly wouldn't "put out" (sorry Kelly) , we broke off that short lived relationship. Kim and Paul continued their dysfunctional relationship for a few months later and finally that came to an end as well. They fought alot and Kim would always get mad at me because I would have Paul's attention more than she wanted me to. lol

I was consoling her one evening after they broke it off, and she was sitting in my car at Hadley elementary school parking lot (not sure why we ended up there...but I think it was because I was trying to take advantage of her...um condition)(What can I say...hormones was running wild at this time in my life) So that's where I first kissed her and that was when she also told me that she was still in Love with Paul...OK so after that stellar announcement, me and my hormones took her and dropped her off home.

After playing hard to get...which only lasted about a week...because she finally came to her senses...lol We started dating and only broke up a few.....dozen OK.. hundred times throughout our 5 year dating time. But we always seemed to find a way to forgive and forget about each others faults and found ourselves back in each others arms.

As I said earlier...I was very much attracted to Kim's smile. But she also had other features that I was attracted to as well. (Besides the obvious one) She is such a kind person...even more so now that she has grown out of her high school jealousy stage (well most of it anyway :) You can usually tell when someone is genuine...and I saw that she was. I also believe you must be physically attracted to your mate and its the core of any relationship...but there must be more to a person in order for you to live the rest of your live with them. Humor to me is a trait that is a MUST ...and Kim had that...she had the ability to make me laugh and smile at will. You don't get a great smile like hers without the ability to laugh alot.  Needlessly to say.... falling in Love with Kim was easy.

So I know you are wondering...Well how did you propose to her Ian? Truth is...I didn't. She pretty much proposed to me. Here's how it went down. I had just got a job working 3rd shift at the same factory that I am still employed at. I had only been working for a couple months and was still adjusting having to sleep during the sunlit hours of the day. I had needed new work boots and being the good girlfriend that Kim was....she offered to go buy some for me if I gave her some money to do so. I gave her sixty bucks and off she went. I was sleeping when she came back and walked in my room. I woke up but still a little groggy when she smiled and told me what she had used my sixty bucks for. Even today when Kim buys something that she really shouldn't have she always starts out the conversation with this statement: "You aren't going to believe what I bought". Nowadays...I just answer..."Oh Yes I will".... but at the time I just answered...."Boots I hope".   Smiling, she told me "No", but she had put a down payment on a wedding dress. Huh? And being in the groggy state that I was in...all I said was....So, what? Were getting married then? And that my friends...goes down in history as the worst proposal ever!! And whenever I get the chance...I always throw this line out : "Hey Kim...have you seen my work boots?....Oh that's right ... I never got any"

But in the overall scheme of things...who really cares how we got married...the more important thing is  we did. It changed my life for the better and I still cherish the fact that we are still together. Being married for a long period of time is never an easy journey. And without the ability to forgive and forget...it will never work.(and yes...I have tested her many times on those ability's). I am so fortunate to have her in my life. Seriously...I don't think I could find a better wife, mother or friend. The amount of Love that Kim has inside her is nothing short of inspiring to me.  She cares for me when I'm ill, she works her tail off at work and at home. She cared for my children. She also knows what I like, and what I dislike And most of all... she Loves me. Lil ole Me!! She is the one person who I know who will care for me when I cant care for myself. (in a few more years of course)  She tells me whats on her mind (even if I don't want to hear it) But she is always honest and sincere.
So when I pray every night...I always thank God for Kim. Without her...I am confident that my life would not have turned out so blessed as it is today. Aside from God...She is my Rock! Her Love does not falter (yet anyways), I look forward to coming home each day, mainly because I know what I am coming home to each day.,..a beautiful, loving and very blessed wife. I Love You Kim!!!!

They ARE Family

We all Love our pets...right?  And most of us have experienced the loss of at least one pet. It never ceases to amaze me how much our pets can change our lives. When I got home today, my brother Dale was there to bury his long time pet Max. They had to put him down because of a tumor that was surrounding his bladder. Max was a Beagle, springer spaniel mix. What a terrific mix of breeds. He was so gentle and loving and obedient. Whenever you fed him he would ever so gently take it out of your fingers. (as opposed to my dog that will take the food and your fingers in one gulp). Max would go to his bed when he was told. He could even rest a piece of food on his nose until Dale told him to get it (I mean he would not move at all) I'm talking for like...3 minutes if Dale waited that long before telling him to "Get it". What more could you possibly want from a Pet?  Pets change us somehow. They make us a more loving and fun people. Pets should make us realize that being trusting, Loving, and obedient is really not just a dog trait...it also a Godly trait  too. If we can trust in God, obey God, and Love the way he loves...I mean....That's all he asks isn't it?     :)

 

In my household we cherish our pets as much as we cherish each other. And in case you didn't know....that's a whole lot of cherishing. We now have 2 dogs, 4 cats, and now 1 bird (Thanks to Taylor)...but we could not love any of them more than we already do. I have had to bury 2 of our Pets. My first dog Levi who lived 16 wonderful years and blessed us with a whole lot of barking and blessed 2 people with bites to their ankles. (Yorkie mixes are a little snippy sometimes) And also our first cat named Moses. He was a very LARGE cat....which was a little ironic to how he actually died. And when I tell you this... try not to laugh..OK? Here goes ...he was closed in the hide away bed in our basement sofa....I know...I know....your asking how in the heck did that happen? Right? Didn't the cat screech or anything? Truth is...no it didn't.We didn't hear anything and it was under a blanket that was spread out and we never saw him when we closed the bed up. We thought the cat ran away for like a week. That is.....until Kim and I were laying down on the sofa watching TV and I said....what the heck is that smell....yeah... I think you know what happens next...I unfold the couch and I saw him...and immediately I told Kim to leave...and at that point she knew too. So....although the way the cat died was nothing short of unique...and yes even a little funny...(allot of jokes have come from it since then)....but at the time it was  still very difficult to lose our pet especially knowing that we are the ones who killed it.

We cry and mourn whenever we lose pets(no matter how they pass) because they are (as we all say) "They are like family" and the reality of it is...They are Family!!  They live in the same household as us, they love us, argue with us, they eat with us, and they also sleep with us. the only difference from our family is ....we choose our pets...and that means we choose to love them too. That means taking care of them even when they cant take care of themselves. (just like we do with Family) So as we say goodbye to our longtime furry or feathered friends...we also say thank you for enriching our lives and teaching us what is really important to life....Love !!!!!

I Had a Dream

So lately , I have been having a hard time sleeping, and I cant understand why. I have been working alot longer than I really should....I have been watching TV later than normal....and I even finished one book and started another and I still have a hard time sleeping. And as annoying as not getting enough sleep is.....something very exciting happened to me the other night......I had a dream !!

When I say "I had a Dream"....imagine me saying it like MLK saying his "I have a Dream" speech....because it was just as historical !!
You see, I rarely ever dream...and I am not exgarratting when I say that...I just dont do it that often. If I do it subconsciencely...I never ever remember them...ever. When I do dream they are usually vivid dreams and I can usually remember them well. This dream is no exception. And this is why it is so special:

I have only had one dream of Timberly since she passed. Now...its two!!  As most dreams are...some of the details are a bit fuzzy..and it wasnt a long dream...just a good one. I remember dancing around in some sort of circle dance. ( Thats when I first knew it was a dream...cuz I do not Dance ...let alone it a circle in some sort of Hokey Pokey go round) But as I came around the circle one time...I saw Timber sitting in (of all things) a highchair (yeah like the kid kind) She was smaller than her normal size and she looked to be about 11 or 12 years old (body wise)  But her face seemed normal except for the fact that she had food around her mouth(it looked like dried baby food...lol) But it was still cute as hell. And when I saw her...I reached out my arms and she reached out her arms  and I remember saying...Have I told you how much I Love you? And I gave her the Biggest hug I have ever gave anyone. (I think at that moment...I thought I was in heaven) But just then...some man with black hair (I didnt see his face) grabbed Timbers shoulder and I remember the scared look on her face. At that moment...I asked her...Has that man ever touched you? (meaning unappropriately) And then I woke up. I soooo did not want to....but with good dreams you never want to wake up. :(  I did not understand the whole thing with the guy...but all I could think about was the beautiful Hug that I gave my baby girl. It was so surreal that I couldnt believe that it happened...I could have held on to her forever. I have thought about the day when I will see her again and be able to hug her and tell her how much I missed and Love her. And to be able to hug her even in a dream...it was seriously a dream come true!!

The next day....it was all I could think about. I HUGGED TIMBER !! And I still hang on to that memory today....its a memory that I hope I hang on to till the day I die. Which might not be for long if I dont start getting some darn sleep :)

Birds and Babies

So I had this Bird who was laying on a nest at the end of my driveway earlier this year. I went out to get the mail one day  and saw this Killdeer (Not sure of the spelling) and she ran from her nest and started to dance frantically in the middle of the road and I was in awe of what this bird would do in order to keep my attention on her instead of the eggs that she was laying on. She would spin in circles and spread one of her wings out as far as it would span and she would squeal as loud as she could. It was really quite a show. But being the inquisitive man that I am...I wanted to see the eggs. And to no surprise, the mother really didn't want me within the city limits to her eggs. She came darting at me with that sharp beak and then run away when I would move toward her (maybe it was away from her....I do have a tendency to exaggerate my manhood). However...after many many times of checking up on the nest and getting the mail and taking the garbage out...she learned that I was not going harm her or her eggs. She actually let me get pretty close (5 -6 feet) before she would run and do her broken wing dance.

Day after day she would sit on her eggs. Only leaving to get a bite to eat and then returning. Day and night, rain or shine she would sit there keeping her eggs at just the right temperature. I remember looking out the window one day when it was just pouring down rain and I was amazed that she was still there.

It reminded me of what mothers go through for nine months. I have always had this cringe that comes over me when I think of a mother giving birth. I know its a natural blessing that God gave the women to endure. However....to me....its just doesn't seem possible that such a BIG thing should come out of such a small opening. I am so thankful that Kim was such a trooper in the delivery room when both our daughter were born. And I am even more happy I didn't look until the head popped out and my brain only allowed my eyes to focused on the head and not the opening. I remember thinking...OMG shes got a hugh head when Taylor popped out. But at that moment.... my eyes welled up with tears. I was filled with joy and could not have been more prouder at that moment. When  we decided to have another child...I was all for it... for two reasons...one...I wanted a son (did it REALLY matter?...NO) but I did want a boy...and I was so convinced that Kim was going to have a boy...I had boy names picked out and was all set on that aspect.In fact I didn't even think about picking out a girls name. And the second reason, was that I was tired of using protection. (Rubbers suck) And the pull out method always ended in a small disappointment. :( So when it came time for the baby to come out...doctor pulls Timberly out and says...Its a Girl !!!  At that moment I cried....I wasn't sure if I was crying because its such a emotional moment or because of the words the doctor said. I think it was a little of both....but both children being born were the two most memorable moments of my life. And the fact that their mother nurtured and cared for these babies for nine months each time so that they are healthy and ready for birth....simply puts me in awe of any mother. Just like the bird who sat on her eggs for 49 days straight...the mother is willing to do anything so that their children can be born.  So to all you Mothers out there...I bow to your unselfish, heroic ability to birth children. Even though I cringe at the very thought of all that Pain ....
OUCH (what can I say....I'm a man)